Reblogged from thosegirlydesires
Random Thoughts
I wanna celebrate and live my life
I’ve always believed that everything happened for a reason. Everything that has been placed in front of me was because God thought I could handle it and I could learn something from it. A few months ago, I had been talking to a guy for a while but didn’t know where I go with it. I was really confused but thought it was because I’ve always been bad with commitment. I tried to convince myself that he was a really good person and could be good for me. Finally, I realized that I didn’t want to be with him. I shouldn’t have to convince myself that I should be with someone. If it was right, it would be right and everything would fall into place. I decided I didn’t need anyone to make me happy and reminded myself I loved being single. About 2 nights after that, my car broke down, and I didn’t know who else to call, so I called him. After I finally got home, I started to think that maybe this was God’s way of telling me I’m not as independent as I think I am. I still need people in my life and I can’t do everything alone.
A week later, I was visiting my best friend in Florida and was introduced to one of her friends. She immediately came up with a plan to set us up and I went along with it because I figured “why not, he’s cute and I’m on vacation.” We went to a piano bar with her and her boyfriend that night and then saw each other the next day while she was working. I started thinking that I might actually like him, but knew I was leaving the next day. After I left, I thought about it and realized that I should be feeling the way I do about him with the boy at school, because I never felt like that before, and even if I never saw him again, that was the sign I was looking for. The realization that I could feel this way about someone, and I shouldn’t settle for anything less than what I had. Whether or not anything comes from it, I’m grateful for the experience that showed me not to be with someone because it’s convenient and could work out in the future, but because I actually have feelings for them.
How a dolphin reacts when they look in a mirror. Pretty similar to how I react…
When I finally figure out what I want. Because then, if I don’t get it, I’m incredibly disappointed. Whereas, if I don’t know what I want, I’m just pleasantly surprised along the way when things start to fall into place. I know that God has a plan for my life, I just hope it matches what I want. I’m sure it will all work out in the end, but I really like the way my life is going right now.
